Will I Ever Know

Turn on your receiver
Tune your frequency
To the great deceiver
Child delinquency

I'm sending out a beacon
I'm sending S O S
You are what I am seeking
I'm alone I guess

Did you really come?
Did you really go?
Will I ever know?

Did you really come?
Did you really go?
Will I ever know?

Proof of you lives on
In the scars upon my wrists
Though you may be gone
You're at the top of all my lists

I know that you're still angry
And damn it so am I
But God himself can't change me
I just can't live a lie

And lies can be so hurtful
Like when you say that you'll be there
As I approach my downfall
And you're not anywhere

But you found greener pastures
While I'm buried in the mud
These all important gestures
Well I'm not feeling good

Did you really come?
Did you really go?
Will I ever know?

Did you really come?
Did you really go?
Will I ever know?

Did you really come?
Did you really go?
Will I ever know?

Did you really come?
Did you really go?
Will I ever know?

The Confounder

Traversing through the midnight squallor
Standing firm and growing taller
I met a worker, nay, a scholar
To be my night's best caller

Her eyes were pools of glistened water
Bruised like life had beat and fought her
This was someone's sister, daughter
Now only canon fodder

I tried to love her, true I did
I gave my heart and cast my bid
When I looked, I found she hid
So I made myself be rid

I won't forget this one encounter
Each night I look but haven't found her
Writher, writher, suffer, flounder
I must find my confounder

Untitled

There's but one place
To treat this wound
Inside my mind
I am cocooned
Rroots and branches
Rarely pruned
Reveal a corpse
With blood festooned

And here inside
My capsuled soul
Is where I now
Fulfill my role
Myriad thoughts
I make my cull
In torment now
I thus am whole

Regret not but
That I am late
I've left my dearest
Ones to wait
Spurning ever
After fate
With thoughts my mind
Can never sate

Tripwire

"Tripwire" by Nathan Langford

I said that I love you
You called me a liar
I told you I hate you
But oh I admire
Your sudden restraint
The heartbeat is faint
I fell on the tripwire

You changed your number
And went back to sleep
In some wicked slumber
You made not a peep
You set the trap
And started to clap
When I fell on the tripwire

And you won't say where you've been
And you won't say what you've done
You didn't fall for all of it again
This time you said the battle's been won

My thoughts fade to black
When I step in the fire
An ambush attack
Stuck in this quagmire
I'm a sitting duck
I ran out of luck
I fell on the tripwire

And you won't say where you've been
And you won't say what you've done
You didn't fall for all of it again
This time you said the battle's been won

A victorious defeat
I retreat, I retreat
I'm bloody and bruised
I was tortured, beat, abused

I'm just so fucking tired

So I fell on the tripwire

Blue Devils

I have but just one soul to sell
I dither in the mire
Transaction made, a trip to Hell
The merchant was a liar

Reeling in these desperate blues
The devil he hath shaken
Consummation of his brews
The devil he hath waken

Drink until your bile's strewn
And splattered on your face
Soiled, soaking, pantaloon
A heavy heart's disgrace

Know to stop but never will
The heart aches to endure
Raise thy glass and take a swill
And pour, and pour some more

Hush little baby
Don't say a word
Keep your mouth shut
Like it never occurred
Plug your ears
Nothing was heard
Big brother is watching
Like fucking Big Bird

Keep your eyes glued
On Sesame Street
Modified food
Soylent meat
Don't mean to be rude
On the government teet
The people subdued
Too slow on their feet

Pray to your God
And cling to your guns
A tip and a nod
To the Atheist ones
A reason for reason
The rest take the blame
And answer for treason
What a shame, what a shame

This poem was sponsored
By the letters F-U
The ice sheets are melting
Don't know what to do
Frozen in oil
Frozen by fear
Hush little baby
Don't shed a tear

I'm living the past
Through your hologram
Damn girl
I thought it would last
But the image you cast

Was haunting me
Taunting me
Like the bullies at school
So fucking cruel
Calling me fat
Like I didn't know that

Your words fucking hurt
Like listening to poison
Can't take the noise in
But I don't have a choice
When you speak in that voice

Because I'm obsessed
Like a man on a mission
To cling to your words
Like a man with a vision
Because I'm possessed
Like a robot with feeling
And I'm fucking reeling
Sleep on the floor
With my head in the ceiling
Can't take anymore
I showed you the door
Now just wait for the healing

I don't stalk you on Facebook
You blocked me, I looked
But even with that second account
I don't look because I'm pushing you out
But you kept me on MySpace
What's that about?
You still use it too
What's wrong with you?

You're just a disease
A parasite, a leach
A mite, a tick or fleas
You breeze through my blood
Like a hurricane of cocaine
Numbing my heart
Driving me insane
Ripping apart the veins
I used to play like a violin
With a knife on my wrist
Like a violent violinist
Playing his tune
To himself in his room
Until the blood disease orchestra
Gathered in puddles
Like seas on the ground
And piled up around him